He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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