go do what you do best...puke behind churches
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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