4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
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