I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
