I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize
