I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
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