I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
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