Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
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