Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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