we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
