I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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