she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
