you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
