There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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