i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize