If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize
