i can't believe i had my finger in that
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
