I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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