Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize