dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize