I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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