There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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