if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize