I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
