i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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