Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
