Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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