No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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