I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
