i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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