what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize