where does the pee come out of this thing
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
You ruined the universe
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
