I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
