Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
only if we run a train.
done.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
