my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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