butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
