I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
