I can't breathe out the right side of my face
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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