2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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