it's not cheating when I paid for it
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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