Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
