Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
