He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
