About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
