Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
