Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
