I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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