Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
