Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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