You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
