Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize